Our history cont...

At this point, I am in shock. I could not believe that I was in this position. No pregnancy after 1 year of trying. This happens to other people, not me. The only thing that they did find on my blood work, was that I had a very minor thyroid deficiency. Not a big deal but they would put me on Synthroid to adj for my hypothyroidism. I should try for 2 cycles and come back. I was not an emotional mess like I know some people get at this point. I don't really remember crying about it. I just remember being so shocked and angry over it. At this point, I started telling close family and friends that we were seeking fertility help. They knew we were trying already so I think they knew there was something up after this much time, so I wouldn't have been able to keep it a secret anyway.

No one knows what its like to go through this unless they have gone through this! I think the most frustrating comments I get to this day is... 1) "your young, you have time"...Yes, we are young, but we have chosen as a couple to start a family and it is something we want now. And regardless of our age, this doesn't change that there is something wrong. 2) "it will happen, just stop thinking about it and relax"....ahhh! seriously! do you really think that the first 6 months I was even thinking about it. It wasn't until 6 months in that I actually starting monitoring myself and thinking about it. Either way, I am not the type to get all clinical about my "trying" experience. I know that these comments are good intentioned and people don't really know what to say, but I still get frustrated when I hear those 2 lines, and I still hear them all the time!

I start my Synthroid and try for another 2 months. We didn't monitor anything or even think about it, we just functioned normally. Still nothing... At this point, the doctor decides to be more proactive. He puts us on fertility medication, monitors my cycle, times my cycle, and gives us a 3 day window to have intercourse. The medications work wonderfully, my body responds as it should to the hormones. I produce alot of eggs, I swell normally, and we are given our dates to do the deed. :-) I am so excited at the monitoring results and I just know this was the boost I need to get pregnant, even though I know it sometimes takes 3 tries for this method to work. I think we spent about $3,000 on this cycle. Our insurance only covered the initial tests but no actual fertility treatment. $3k is alot but no big deal considering this is going to work and I will be pregnant in a couple weeks. So the cycle ends, and I run to the store and by a pregnancy test. This is the one thing the fertility centers tell you not to do. They tell you to wait till you get your blood test b/c there are false negatives on the store bought test and they don't want you to get upset for nothing. SIKE! Who the heck can wait till there appointment and then wait for the blood test to get back. That's crazy talk. I get home rip open the test and venture off to the bathroom. Negative....